Addictions are major problems in general. However, when they are included in part of a relationship, they can tear things apart very quickly. Addictions don’t just affect a person’s physical health, but they affect them psychologically, too. In addition, the addiction will affect everyone around the addict. Unfortunately, it is very difficult for someone with an addiction, whether that be to drugs or alcohol, to sustain healthy relationships. Generally, the addict and the people in their life will lose their happiness and self-esteem.
The majority of the time addicts are focused on how and when they will get to use alcohol or drugs. The rest of the time they are using the substances. Sadly, this isn’t going to change until they get the help they need.
If you are in a relationship with someone who has an addiction, there are people who can assist and support you. If you are the one who has an addiction and you want to stop letting that destroy your relationships, our Harmony Oaks team can help you.
Being Dishonest
Addiction tears people apart from one of the things that means the most in life – healthy relationships. Part of the reason for this is that people with addictive personalities are often dishonest. They lie about their addiction because of the fear of judgment. They also lie to their loved ones because they don’t think anyone is going to understand them. There are many things that addicts might lie about including:
- Where they are going
- Who they are hanging out with
- How they are spending money
- Why they are acting differently
- Why things come up missing
If you are dealing with an addict who is being dishonest or you struggle with dishonesty due to your addictive behaviors, don’t hesitate to contact our Harmony Oaks team today to get help.
Don’t Trust the Addict
Due to the addict being dishonest, the people in their life may not trust anything they do or say. This can be extremely damaging to a relationship. Relationships are built on trust, socializing, loyalty and respect. Once any of these things are betrayed, the relationship starts becoming rocky. Intimate relationships like partnerships and marriages are usually affected the most by drug and alcohol addictions. Unfortunately, breakups and divorce generally occur when someone in the relationship has any number of addictions.
Some of the issues that often result due to addictive behaviors are possessiveness, fear and jealousy. People with an addiction are usually tired out, lose interest in their previous social groups and focus on what helps them to get alcohol or drugs. In general, people are hesitant to trust those they know have an addiction and for fair reason in most cases. However, if you know someone with an addiction, it is best to do your best to support and encourage them into getting treatment. The sooner they do this, the better it will be for them and those in their life.
Becoming Violent or Abusive
There are people who are so calm and friendly that turn violent and abusive when they are under the influence of drugs or alcohol. Drugs such as stimulants may hype people up causing them to lose control of their emotions. There are depressants such as alcohol that cause people to just not care how they act to others. Oftentimes, domestic violence and other traumas occur in these situations.
The truth is that any type of substance abuse can make people aggressive. Even small provocations or no provocations at all could make an addict turn on their loved ones. The violence can also start from a person that isn’t addicted to alcohol or drugs. Sometimes, the other person in the relationship can get angry with the person who has addictions and become abusive, as well.
Codependency
Another one of the common issues in relationships is codependency. People who are in this type of relationship often don’t realize the help they are offering isn’t what the addict needs. They may like being needed or helping out the person who is “victim”. However, they aren’t thinking about how their “help” is really just keeping the addict living in a fantasy, addictive world. It is important that people only support and help addicts in ways that encourage them to get into recovery.
If you are in a codependent relationship with an addict, there are support groups and therapies that you can get into to help you overcome this issue. It may take some time to do this, however, in time you can learn how to stop yourself from always trying to enable your friend or loved one. If you are the one who has an addiction, but is codependent in a relationship or dealing with codependency in someone else, you can learn how to manage this through a program here at Harmony Oaks Recovery Center.
Causing Personal Destruction
One other way that addicts cause damage to their relationships is due to the personal destruction they bring about. For example, if you have an addiction, you might call into your loved one’s work to bother them about borrowing money and this could cause them to get fired. You may also bring about a level of anxiety in this person that causes them to have lower self-esteem or trouble accomplishing their goals.
If you know you are causing personal destruction in someone’s life, don’t wait until things get even worse. It is time to get into recovery and work on your underlying issues. In time, you can make amends to these people and show them how much you have changed. There is a chance that may help to heal the relationship.
Get into Recovery to Start Developing Better Relationships
Do you struggle with an addiction to harmful substances such as alcohol or drugs? If so, have you noticed a decline in the health of your relationships? You might be lying to or deceiving your loved ones or friends. They may not trust anything you say or do. It may be that you are causing personal destruction in their life and that is damaging your relationship. No matter what the case may be, there are ways that you can turn things around.
While you may not be able to heal all the damage that has been done in your relationship, you can do your best to show this person that you are doing all you can to make changes in how you act.
Are you ready to overcome your addiction or do you need to find a treatment program for your loved one or friend? If so, contact us today to get into recovery so better relationships can start developing in your life.